Just wanted to share that the CT scan shows the fluid is GONE, there are less cells than last time, and that the radiation on the esophagus is decreasing! This is an answer to my prayer request! God is good!


It was hard for the nurses to find my veins this time, so instead of three sticks, I got five this time. I will be calling in the morning to see about getting a mediport appointment in May for sure. :-) Dr. Walker wants me to stop the inhaler and thinks that is what has been causing me to be so hoarse. Also, the chemo I'm taking causes sinus issues, so it could be that. We'll try dropping the inhaler now that the fluid is less and hope that takes care of the hoarseness. I surely hope so. If you could pray about the hoarseness and that the sinus issues would be minimal that would be great.

I finally got the nerve up to ask the doctor today as I know many of you have asked when will I be finished with chemo. I am on a maintenance dose of chemo on a four week schedule. The type of lung cancer I have responds to this mixture of chemo as long as you stay on the maintenance dose. If you stop the chemo, within four to six weeks, the cancer would multiply rapidly. So, at this point, I will be continuing the maintenance dose . Of course, we are still trusting the Lord for complete healing. As long as I'm not sick with any other illnesses or the chemo tiredness, I am able to function at about 80% of what I used to do, so I am thankful for that. The Lord has helped me through 2.4 years now and I'm trusting him to restore my health and that I will live a long time.

I am thankful for each prayer you have prayed on our behalf! May each of you be blessed for your faithfulness to pray for us.

In Him,

Molly

I'm still here. I'm sorry to have not updated before now, but we had

a hard winter with lots of sickness in our family.   Our family has never been so sick before.   My husband managed to stay well, thank the Lord.    We have variations of the flu, bronchitis, strep throat, pneumonia, sinusitis, and the common cold from mid-February until two weeks ago.   I am still recovering from pneumonia and strep throat, but praise the Lord, I feel better than I did a week ago.    I got very weak from the strep throat because I couldn't eat since my throat hurt so bad.   I have been SO hungry for the past two weeks so I've been trying to eat and drink as much as I can.   It's helping me to get stronger.   I am also on Prednisone so that isn't helping my appetite.   I'm usually not phased by Prednisone, but I have been this time.

I'm really glad to see spring come.   This winter was very hard for me and I've struggled with depression.   Being sick on top of that has left me a little battle weary.   I've not been this low spiritually since all of this began.   I'm trying to read or listen to the Word more often and watching what comes out of my mouth.   I so want to have confidence in what His Word says and that that Truth will nestle deep down inside of me again.   I want it to be life to me again.    Please pray I can get my eyes back on Him and his Word and not on the circumstances.

I will be having a CT scan on Monday to see if the fluid they saw two months ago has gone.    Please pray that it is and that there are no new cancer cells.    Also, please be praying that the radiation that is on my esophagus is gone.   I had radiation in that area back in October and the last CT scan showed it was still there.   That combined with the chemo makes me cough a lot.   I'm praying that they won't find anything and that the Lord will heal me of this dreadful disease.   Cancer changes your life in many ways, some good and some bad.

I do have some praises that are worthy to be mentioned and He deserves the glory for them.    We received a check for a large amount of money a few months ago from a group of people.   I don't know who they are as the card was not signed.   If you were amongst that group of people, THANK YOU for the blessing!!!   It was timely and greatly needed.    We appreciate your generosity so much!    My daughter received the money she needs for the summer school session she has to take, praise God!    The Lord has been blessing my husband with extra work to earn extra money at his job.   That is a huge praise in this economy!   We have many extra expenses with medical bills, food and medicine needs, and of course, as you all are experiencing as well, the cost of living just keeps rising.   We are thankful for his job and that we have very good insurance.    So far this year, my medical charges have been over $200,000 and it's only April.   Thankfully, most of what we have to pay is a $35.00 co-pay and our $1500 deductible, but that does add up quickly when you go to the doctor at least three times a month.    I just have to trust the Lord with all of it because it is way too big for me.  

Thank you for continuing to follow my blog and for your continued prayers for our family!   Please pray that the Lord will heal me completely.   I am trusting Him for that.

God bless you,

Molly

To God Be the Glory!

This week marks two years since I found out I had cancer. I cannot let this time go by without giving Him praise as we stand in awe at what the Lord has done in these past two years. Doctors will tell you all the statistics, etc., but we chose to not listen to them. I AM NOT A STATISTIC in God's eyes and I refuse to listen to the what if's and predictions that the doctors say about my situation. As a friend told me early on in this walk, only God knows the day He will call each of us home. 

One of the things that we've learned through this journey has been to truly be thankful for each day and use it for His glory serving Him, doing His will and walking with Him. Each day is not a guarantee, but truly a gift from above. It's so easy to get caught up on the merry go round of things that life throws at us, that we begin to keep God at arm's length and then He is put further and further away. He wants to be involved in our lives every day, not just when it is convenient or problems arise.

We're also learning that what used to bother or concern us, we just really need to put in the Lord's hands and let Him take care of it. He told us to not worry or have anxiety or fret, but to pray and watch expectantly to see what He will do. He told us numerous times in His word to not be anxious, so I've really tried to pray about things and just release them. With all the extra medical expenses this past year, I've had to really learn to let go of that care. We've been amazed to see His hand move. We were blessed several times with financial gifts because God knew we needed it. He is such a loving and caring God! He really does care about His children and all the details of our lives. I can't tell you how many times I'd receive a call, card, visit, meal, or gift just when I really needed it. Those things just confirmed to me how much He truly loves me. 

We have also learned in the past two years about the power of prayer. We can look back over the past two years and see where His hand has moved in mighty ways. He has answered so many of our prayers I can't remember them all. YOU have been a part of those answered prayers and we are so very thankful for each prayer you've prayed on behalf of our family. This journey isn't just about us. Every person that has been a part of this journey is learning something new about the Lord. This is just an avenue He is using to draw us all closer to Him. How many times have you prayed for us and we got the answer and got excited to see how He answered it? God has been so good to us and He alone deserves all the glory, praise, and honor. 

I am truly thankful to be alive today and to be feeling almost like I did before all this started. Praise Him with me! I do covet your continued prayers that I continue to do well and for complete healing. Pray that our faith will continue to grow as we trust Him with the future. There is still a battle to be fought in the mind, body, and for our faith. Pray that we will obey Him and leave the consequences to Him.

Thank you to each of you that have supported us through these past two years and for walking this journey with us!

Love,

Molly

As I reflect on the past year and look forward to the New Year....

*I wrote this post last January 1, 2010 and re-read it today.   I can't help but re-post it because it says exactly what I would want to say again today as we begin a new year.  I made a few changes and hope you don't mind the re-post.  :-)
**********************************************************************************
As I reflect on the past year and look forward to the New Year..... 


"Now to him who is able to accomplish abundantly far more than all we can ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work in us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." - Ephesians 3:20-21~

Today on this last day of this year as I reflect on how generous God has been and is to us. As we look back on the year and all that’s happened to us, there are lots of mixed feelings.  We've had our struggles and fears.   We've had heartache and pain.  We have been touched with rest and relief; as well as moments of joy and comfort too. While it’s easy to focus on what has gone wrong, we must refocus on what has gone right. God has joined us and is accompanying us on this journey.  He understands our distress.  He is bringing help in every moment of need.  This is cause for celebration and relief! 

As this year closes and another is about to begin, help me Lord to not  focus just on what has been hard for me. Instead help me find  encouragement and hope in recounting all that has blessed and uplifted me this year. There are more blessings than I can say.  Thank you for seeing us through another year.   While it has been the hardest year of my life, you have been faithful to walk with me through it.   Help me to have an attitude of gratitude, for you have done exceedingly more for us than we could ever imagine.  Thank you, Lord.  Amen.

A devotion to share with you.

I will give to the Lord the thanks due to his righteousness, and sing praise to the name of the Lord, the Most High. ~    Psalm 7:17 

Cancer survivors understand that gratitude is at the very heart of creating an atmosphere of healing. Survivors know that it is essential to be in the right state of mind to focus on hope for the journey. They believe that living thankfully and appreciatively is a profound requirement for achieving the state of well-being they seek. Being mindful of the need to find goodness and count blessings is ever-present in a survivor’s life. They focus on what is right and what is good, what is positive and what is eternal. They look beyond temporary setbacks to seek evidence of lasting answers and help. When they do they find the evidence they need.  

The more I look for the blessings you give me, dear God, the more I see signs and wonders of your amazing love. Every time I realize one good thing you do, I come to recognize there are so many more good things than I never knew before. Thank you for compounding the blessings in my life. Amen.

(Reprinted from Foundation for Cancer Research and Wellness)

I just wanted to pass on the good news I received at my doctor's visit yesterday.   I went in for a check up on my bloodwork.   All of it came back fine.   This is where he watches the white platelet counts, the hemoglobin level, and the white blood cell counts so he can determine if I need another white platelet shot or a transfusion.    He was pleased with that and how I am feeling that he moved my maintenance chemo from December 27 until January 3rd!!   Yay!   Now, I can have time off with the children during their break and not feel bad.

I asked him for further information on why I need to to the maintenance chemo.    He said that studies show in my particular case, that doing IV maintenance chemo is more successful at keeping the cancer at bay than by using the oral chemo.   He told me to look at it as people who have to take blood pressure medicine everyday and not just see at as I'm getting chemo every four to five weeks.   They need that medicine to maintain their blood pressure just like I need this to keep the cancer at bay, thus extending my life.   Many cancer survivors live with maintenance  chemo.    I heard of a person yesterday that has been getting maintenance chemo for 16 years and she lives a full life.   That's incredibly amazing to me and such encouragement to me!     I will be getting a much less amount of chemo every four to five weeks than when we were doing it every three weeks.    It will only take ten minutes for the maintenance chemo to go in, plus I will continue to get the bone strengthening medicine that takes fifteen minutes.    We're unsure how it will affect me.   He said some people are just very tired the next day and then they are fine.   Others it might affect them like it did me this time with tiredness, headache and nausea for five days.    So, we'll just have to see what happens.

I have to tell you this and then I'll close.   I felt bad from Wednesday after chemo until this Tuesday.   I started feeling better on Wednesday, so I made a list of errands I needed to run soon.   I had eleven places I needed to go, so I thought if I feel good on Thursday, I'll do half then and the other half on Friday or Saturday.   Well, I left the house with Emily at 2:00 on Thursday and we ran all 11 errands.   We got home that evening and I was still feeling good!!!!!!!!!!!   Yay!   We took time to eat a salad while we were out so I rested then and got a second wind, so off we went.   I cannot tell you how good it felt to be out and about and not feel bad or tired. I felt like the "real Molly" again.  :-)  PTL!

So when I went to the doctor on Friday, he asked me how I was feeling and I said, "I feel like a resurrected Frosty the Snowman" and he laughed.   I told him I had run 11 errands the day before and that I felt good on Friday as well.   He just grinned and said, "This is wonderful news!"   Later on, I asked him how he thought I was doing and was he pleased with my progress.   He looked at me and he said, "You told me that you ran 11 errands yesterday and felt good.   Molly, most healthy people can't run 11 errands in one day.   So, I think you're doing incredible!"   To come from where I've been these past six months, I truly have felt like a breathe of fresh wind has been put in my body and I am alive again!   To God be the Glory, Great Things He Has Done!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Living with hope again,

Molly 

Thanks to those of you who continue to follow my blog even though I don't post often.   I really appreciate your faithfulness.  2010 has been a hard year for me, but I'll try to do better in the coming year.  Thanks for sticking with me! :-)

Blessings,

Molly